i am completely full of crap.
i ask you to show me who you are. i remind you not to wait till you’ve lost that weight, or have the right outfit, or the sky looks just right. that this time keeps whizzing by and there’s not a lot of room to wiggle into exactly what you want it all to look like. that Now is the right time. that Now is beautiful, and worth recording. because in a quick blink, it is all gone and not showing back up, and the moment has passed and these words and pictures, the stories and recordings, are all we have. so at 1 am, on the eve (or morning, if you want be specific) of a big and adventurous trip for my sons and i, when i’m about to lie down, bags packed, lists checked off, boys sleeping (lanky linked arms), the mister sleeping (anxious about his family hitting the road without him, worrying himself to sleep), i think “how lame that i never got the blog going”,(and i think this for the 157th time) and then pop out of bed, remembering that indeed i did start this darn thing. and it’s a whole 5 posts deep, ( in 11 months and with a good 15 drafts waiting) , with it’s inaugural post claiming how even when i wasn’t ready, i would launch this stupid thing into the world and share my story…and i haven’t. partly because life got less pretty (there are many half stories about that waiting in my draft box here ), partly because there are so many more important stories to read about and mostly because i wanted to wait till i had it all right. till i’d sussed out the links and perfected those posts and found my guest bloggers and at least read a few other blogs and blah blah blah. but life kept spinning and i caught myself doing the same thing i encourage everyone to avoid… trying to wait till it’s perfect. and it never is. still, everyone has a story to tell. and every story is worth recording. and here is part of ours, which will be littered with imperfections and will likely always be incomplete and i may show you just half of me now ; the prettier part that cuts off the big zit on my chin, and the black and white may lessen my laugh lines, but still, i have a story to tell. and it’s not all that exciting or meaningful to many, but it’s a story all the same. and one that i want, at the very least, my boys to be able to look back on and see and know and remember. hopefully with a smile. so i will let go of the waiting; to perfect the logo or many drafts and thoughts from the last year. i will start with now, with remembering and documenting how this adventure goes… both the one close at hand and the one long laid out before us. and then maybe i can feel okay asking you to allow me to capture yours.
